Crime of Magic Page 9

  “Chill out, cat.” The wolf stopped about ten feet from us, and Muffin settled down, as if he liked the vibe of this wolf. “What are you doing in these woods?”

  “Trying to pass through,” Lachlan said.

  “Almost no one comes here. Not on Thursdays, at least.” He frowned, fingering his bonnet with a furry paw.

  “Where’s Grandma?” I asked.

  “Playing bridge with the girls.” An air of honesty rang in the wolf’s voice.

  “You didn’t eat her?” I asked.

  His face twisted, annoyed. “Red is still spreading tales, huh?”

  I pointed at his outfit. “So, she’s lying about you eating her grandmother and dressing up in Grandma’s clothes in order to trick her and eat her too?”

  The wolf frowned. “First, I just like wearing Grandma’s clothes, okay? I find it relaxing. And second, Red is a pain in the tail who just spreads stories.”

  “She doesn’t like that you take her grandmother’s clothes?” Lachlan asked.

  “Rude!” The wolf pointed at Lachlan. “I don’t take. Grandma and I have an arrangement. I keep the other wolves away. She lets me borrow her clothes. We’re friends.”

  “Sounds like a good arrangement,” I said. “And Red sounds like a jerk.”

  “She really is.” He nodded, clearly pleased that I agreed. “So what’s east? You’re not going to Fairy Tale City, are you?” He gave us a skeptical look.

  I glanced down at Muffin, who was looking approvingly at the wolf. Muffin shot me a look. He’s a good canine.

  Since I trusted Muffin’s judgment, and the wolf wasn’t setting off any of my danger warnings, I answered honestly. “Yes, we’re looking for the beanstalk to get up there. We need to find Torlock the Dark.”

  “Hmmm.” The wolf crossed his arms. His expression was even more doubtful. “You’re going to need a guide.”

  “For what?” Lachlan asked. “The city?”

  “And to find Torlock. Unless you have an invitation—which you don’t, from the lily-white look of your auras—you won’t be able to find her without a guide. And you’ll get hassled in Fairy Tale City.”

  “What’s white about our auras?” I asked. I’d seen Lachlan’s. His was black and silver. Bree had said mine was green, though I’d never seen it myself. They didn’t exactly show up in a mirror.

  “I can see good and bad, dark and pure.” He pointed at us. “And you two are pure. Like driven snow. You shouldn’t be getting mixed up with the likes of Torlock the Dark.”

  “Not normally, no,” I said. “But we need something from her. Would you be our guide?”

  He nodded. “For a price.”

  “How much?” Lachlan asked.

  “Not money.” He pulled at his dress. “I’ve got everything I want. Friends, food, nice clothes from Grandma. But I do need a spot of help.”

  “With what?” I asked.

  “That nasty Jack has been pestering the giant who lives on top of the beanstalk. He climbed up there and stole some gold. Then he stole the goose. Then the cow. Honestly, it’s too much. And the dwarves heard him talking that he wasn’t going to stop. He’ll kill the giant if he has to, in order to get all his treasure.”

  “Jack sounds like a real piece of work,” I said.

  “An arse.” Lachlan’s tone pulled no punches.

  The wolf nodded in agreement. “Exactly. The giant is wealthy, but a little slow.” He pointed to his head. “Marching around all the time. Fee Fi Fo Fum and all that. But he’s our giant, and we’re going to look out for him.”

  “And that’s your job?” I asked. “You want us to help you stop Jack?”

  “Exactly.” The wolf held out his hands. “Not kill him, mind you. I don’t have the stomach for that. So far, he’s just stolen. But we need to stop him, somehow.”

  “Do you have a prison? Or police?” I asked, imagining fairy tale cops. Obviously, they were ferrets or something equally menacing but cute.

  “No, we tend to do that at a local level.” He pointed at himself. “Hence the wolf in a dress trying to stop a jerk from killing a giant.”

  I grinned. “Fair point. So you can’t lock him up, and we can’t cut down the beanstalk because it’s how other fairy tale creatures access Fairy Tale City, right?”

  The wolf frowned. “You can see why this is a conundrum.”

  “Yep.” I looked at Lachlan. “Any ideas?”

  Lachlan thought for a moment, then patted his pocket. “Is there a lake nearby? One with a lot of weeds in it?”

  “You’re going to stop him with lake weed?” the wolf asked him.

  “Not exactly. But I’m good with potions. If I can find some Oblivisi weed, I can make something that will force Jack to forget the beanstalk and the giant. He’ll walk by it and be unable to even see it.”

  The wolf grinned, revealing rows of sharp white teeth. “I like this plan. We’ll go to the pond right away. You’ll have a giant bullfrog to contend with, but if we can get past him, you’ll get your weeds.”

  “The frog prince?” I asked.

  “No. Just a giant bullfrog with a bad temper and a taste for wolf. For any large animal, really. Including humans.”

  “Lead on, then,” Lachlan said.

  The wolf led us through the forest, his dress billowing in the wind. It was really quite flattering on him. I could see why he liked it. The cats seemed to have taken a liking to him too—they seemed to like anyone who lived their truth—and walked alongside.

  I smelled the fresh water before I saw it.

  The wolf stopped and held up a furry paw. “We’re nearly there.” He pointed to Lachlan. “You, get your weeds. I’ll be lookout. And you, lady, you distract the bullfrog. The cats could help. He might like them.”

  “How do I distract him?”

  “A story might do it,” the wolf said.

  That didn’t sound so bad.

  “And if it doesn’t work,” the wolf continued, “try to get him to eat you, then lead him on a chase. He’s pretty quick, but awkward. You should manage.”

  Aaaand, there it was. Nothing was ever easy. But I nodded. “Let’s do this.”

  The wolf grinned again, extra fangy this time. He led us toward the pond, which gleamed with a dark light. Lily pads floated on the perimeter, but the center was empty. To the far right, a giant lump sat in the water.

  The bullfrog.

  “Be careful,” Lachlan whispered, before heading off to the left.

  The wolf gave me a thumbs-up. I smiled weakly, then walked right, mind racing with a story to tell the bullfrog. The cats followed alongside.

  You got something good? Muffin asked.

  “I don’t know,” I whispered.

  Tell him about tuna fishes. They’re very big and tasty. I could listen to stories about tuna fishes for hours.

  “I’ll consider it.” If he thought about his stomach half as much as Muffin, maybe I could tell him tales of the giant bugs that had attacked us.

  I neared the huge lump in the water. Fates, he was big. The size of the buggy, if not larger. His back and eyes were above the surface, while the rest of him was below. Could he eat me in one bite, or would it take two?

  One.

  I looked down at Muffin and whispered, “You’re not making me feel any better.”

  I sure hope you have a good story.

  In the distance, I spotted Lachlan. He was on the other side of the lake. He’d stripped off his shirt, shoes, and pants, and was clad in a tiny pair of tight shorts that I assumed he called underwear. I swallowed hard at the sight of his muscles, a broad expanse that would put Fabio to shame.

  Eyes on the prize.

  Startled, I looked at Muffin.

  Princess Snowflake III meowed, and though I couldn’t understand her the way I could understand Muffin, it was very clear that she was trying to say, She is looking at the prize.

  The bullfrog shifted and snorted, blowing water up into the air. I stiffened, eyeing him warily. His big
eyes popped open and stared right at me.

  Showtime.

  “Hi!” I jumped onto a rock behind me, trying to get a little height and distance away from the frog.

  Like a mountain shifting, he rose out of the water. Oh hell. He could eat me and the cats in one bite.

  “Who are you?” His voice was so deep that it vibrated through me. His enormous tongue snapped out, nearly touching my face.

  I flinched backward.

  Behind him, Lachlan eased into the water. As if he’d sensed the intrusion into his pond, the bullfrog started to turn.

  “I’m Ana the Great!” I shouted. “Here to tell you a fabulous story.”

  The frog turned to look at me, interest suddenly gleaming in his eyes. “A story?”

  “Yes. A great one.” Did he not wonder why I showed up out of the blue and said I was going to do this?

  “Well, go on.”

  Apparently, not. The bullfrog wasn’t the smartest. Considering that he could eat me, I was going to take whatever advantage I had.

  “Well, one day, there were three girls.” My mind raced, bringing back the tale of when my sisters and I had just started our business driving across Death Valley. “They lived in a very dangerous place called Death Valley. It was full of monsters of all varieties. Huge snakes and wicked birds with knives for feathers.”

  “Don’t like birds,” the bullfrog said. “Too crunchy.”

  I grimaced. Was I crunchy? Probably. “Anyway, the girls had a friend. Their only friend, in fact. He was an old man they called Uncle Joe, and one day, he didn’t return from a trip across the valley. They knew that something terrible must have happened to him.”

  I peeked around the bullfrog, spotting Lachlan swimming out to the middle of the pond. Apparently, he was going to dive for the weed. Damn. That was dangerous. The bullfrog could definitely swim faster than him.

  I started talking faster, hoping to entrance the bullfrog. “The girls set off on their first trip across the desert. They’d never done it before, and their vehicle wasn’t nearly ready for the task. They didn’t realize they were unprepared, but it wouldn’t have stopped them.”

  “And then what?” the bullfrog demanded.

  “Well, they—”

  The bullfrog stiffened. “Intruder!”

  How the heck had he figured it out? The bullfrog shifted, about to turn. Behind him, Lachlan was swimming back to shore, something green clutched in his fist.

  Princess Snowflake III yowled, a shriek unlike any I’d ever heard.

  The bullfrog whirled around, eyeing her with beady eyes. Rage flared within them. “What did you say?”

  She yowled again. The bullfrog puffed up, clearly enraged.

  Better run for it! Muffin turned tail and streaked through the forest. The other two followed, hightailing it out of there.

  The bullfrog crouched low, clearly ready to leap after us in pursuit.

  My stomach dropped.

  Oh crap.

  I turned and ran, vacating my rock just as the bullfrog landed on it. The bullfrog croaked. I sprinted as fast as I could, my lungs burning. The frog pursued, giant leaps nearly landing him on top of me each time.

  Muffin’s weird, low meow sounded from the right, and I glanced over. He stood in a thicker patch of trees, in an area where the spaces between the oaks was much narrower.

  Come on, slowpoke! Or you’ll be frog chow!

  I wheeled right and sprinted toward him. As fast as I could, I darted through the trees. Behind me, the bullfrog skidded to a stop. He was too wide to fit through the gaps between the trunks.

  Princess Snowflake III yowled again, clearly unable to help herself from hurling insults at the frog.

  “Come on, guys!” I spun and sprinted away, the cats at my side.

  Behind us, the bullfrog croaked angrily.

  That was fun! Muffin sprinted along beside me.

  “You need new hobbies, if that was fun,” I said.

  He did his weird cat laugh. Up ahead, I spotted the wolf and Lachlan. The wolf held the green leaves, while Lachlan dressed in his clothes again. I ran up to them and stumbled to a halt as my heart raced.

  “Well done!” said the wolf. “That was clearly an excellent story.”

  “I didn’t even finish. Did you get the Oblivisi weed?” I asked.

  Lachlan nodded, his face flushed as he pulled on his clothes. “The weeds were thick at the bottom. It was easy.”

  “Good. What do you do now?” I asked.

  Dressed, he pulled a little glass vial from his pocket.

  I recognized it. “Is that the healing potion?”

  “Good thing I saved it, right? Same base properties as the Oblivisi potion. I just need to add the weeds.” He took them from the wolf and made quick work of grinding them up with two rocks. Then he poured the dust into the open vial of healing potion. He held his hand over the vial, and his magic surged on the air. Sparkling light glittered around his fingers, flowing down into the vial. It smoked, giving off a foul scent, then he corked it. “All done.”

  “You have some kind of power over potions,” I said. “That’s one of your twelve?”

  He nodded. “I can create things that others can’t.”

  “No kidding.” I shivered at the idea of a potion that could make you forget.

  “What do we do with it?” the wolf asked.

  Lachlan frowned. “That’s the hard part. He must drink it.”

  The wolf laughed. “Oh, that’s no problem at all. Give it here. I’ll take care of it.”

  Lachlan handed over the potion. “How long will it take to find him?”

  “With any luck, he’ll be at his house. Come on.” The wolf led us back through the forest. Fifteen minutes later, we neared the edge. The sun shined brighter through the trees, illuminating the little blue flowers on the ground. In the distance, a massive beanstalk rose out of the middle of a field. Giant rocks sat scattered around, as if a giant had thrown giant marbles.

  But it was the beanstalk that had my attention.

  I swallowed hard, my skin chilling.

  I was going to climb up that thing.

  Holy fates, give me giant bullfrogs and devil bunnies any day. I looked at Lachlan.

  As if he could read my thoughts, his face softened. “It’ll be fine.”

  “I know. I’m tough.”

  “Look!” The wolf pointed to a figure that crossed the field. It was a man wearing farmer’s clothes, a straw hat shielding him from the sun. “That’s Jack, headed to the beanstalk now. We were just in time. You two can follow, but hang back about twenty feet and stick behind the boulders. I need to talk to him.”

  He took off across the field, dress fluttering in the wind.

  “This is so weird,” I said.

  “I quite like it,” Lachlan said. “If you told me I’d be spending time with fairy tale creatures and enjoying it, I might have said you were crazy. But as it turns out, it’s not a bad time at all.”

  I grinned. He had a good point there. “Come on.”

  We hurried after the wolf, keeping the distance he’d requested and making sure there were giant rocks between us and Jack. When he stopped next to Jack, we stopped, too, hanging back twenty feet and tucking ourselves behind a huge boulder. I could just barely hear the wolf’s voice. Jack’s back was to us, so he couldn’t see us.

  Would this really work?

  9

  “Oy, Jack! How are you?”

  I winced. The wolf was a terrible fake. His voice was too high-pitched and way stressed. At least I knew he was genuine when talking to us.

  “Fine, wolf,” Jack said. “Why are you acting so strange?”

  “Oh, no reason.” The wolf uncorked the vial and slowly raised it to his lips.

  “What’s that there?” His voice sounded greedy.

  “Oh, this?” The wolf’s voice cracked. “Nothing at all.” He raised it to his lips again.

  “Why don’t you share a bit?” Jack asked.

&nb
sp; “No!” The wolf jerked the vial back.

  “Why are you being so selfish, wolf?”

  The wolf wasn’t the selfish one, that was for sure. And he might be a bad actor, but he was a damned good judge of character. Jack was a greedy bastard. No wonder he’d climbed the beanstalk so many times, endlessly stealing from the giant.

  “Hey now!” the wolf yelped. His acting was getting a bit better.

  Jack grabbed the vial and chugged it down, not seeming to realize that the wolf gave it up without a fight.

  A moment passed.

  Silence.

  I glanced at Lachlan, who just smiled at me.

  “Well, wolf, I think I’ll be on my way. I must go help mother with the cow.”

  “Goodbye, Jack,” the wolf said.

  I peeked around the boulder, catching sight of Jack walking away from the beanstalk. “It worked.”

  “Of course it worked,” Lachlan said.

  We joined the wolf, who was picking up the vial and recorking it. He handed it back to Lachlan. “Well done, sir! That worked like a charm.”

  “And he’ll never remember the beanstalk?” I asked.

  “He won’t. Can’t even see it anymore.”

  “That’s some powerful stuff.” I eyed the vial nervously. He had the power to make people forget things. I’d been nervous when he’d made it, but seeing it put into use like that really made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

  “I’m careful how I use it. And Jack clearly deserved it.”

  True enough.

  “Come on, then,” the wolf said. “Let’s head up the beanstalk. There’s supposed to be a storm later, and you don’t want to get caught halfway up in that.”

  Nerves skated along my skin at the memory of trying to climb the Eiffel Tower in the rain.

  Lachlan reached for my hand and squeezed, sending a frisson of comfort and desire straight through me. It was a weird combo, but I liked it.

  We followed the wolf toward the beanstalk. I walked quickly, shoving my nerves down tight. Focus on the job.

  We stopped at the edge of the beanstalk, which was much skinnier than I expected. It was only a few feet thick, with knobby lumps and leaves sticking off it. I looked up, feeling my head spin at the sight of the stalk disappearing far up into the sky. It went on endlessly, swaying in the wind.